made a big deal about this kid. I don't
even remember his name. He doesn't race any more - - one of those child-star
types. He's probably in some gutter on some nowhere world now, sucking on his
last deathstick. It always happens. Anyway, this kid, he just ran Sebulba
over, and everyone was like, Man, this kid is great. But what no one knows is,
I was scheduled to race that day. Just didn't. Had engine trouble. Some droid
dropped a hydrospanner in my outflow. So I didn't race, Sebulba lost, and
nobody knows I would've won.
The?runty guy? at home.
Yara: So you have a lot of technical malfunctions, then?
Kerd: A lot? I don't know about a lot. Everybody has some. It's racing.
Yara: Right. I have some statistics. I'm going to share them with our
viewers at home. It looks like you've entered over 700 races in the past
decade. Does that sound about right?
Kerd: Yeah, I guess. Give or take.
Yara: Of those 700, you've won 50, and come in second in another 82. That
Kerd: You better believe it, beautiful. You're looking at a top-shelf
winner. None better. You know you want to give the Kerd-man your number.
Yara: Funny you should mention numbers, Kerd-man. Because based on what I
just said, you've come in first or second in 132 races out of around 700
Kerd: Yeah. So?
Yara: So you also told us that every race in which you haven't come in
first or second, it's been because of mechanical problems.
Kerd (finally catching on): Yeah?
Yara: Oh, it just seems like 568 mechanical problems is a lot, that's
all. You ever consider getting a new mechanic?
Kerd: The Kerd-man does all his own work!